married

A man brings his best buddy home for dinner. His wife shouts at him, "My hair and makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I'm still in my pyjamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight! So what the f* did you bring him around for?" "Cause he's thinking of...

Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend. One evening, after the honeymoon, he was organizing his golfing equipment. His wife was standing nearby watching him. After along period of silence she finally speaks. "Honey, I've been thinking, now that we're married I think it's...

Got married again and I went on the Internet to see how happy everyone was for me. F**king hell, it was awful. One woman... she said, 'Married again, eh? She's a user and he's a pervert.' And I'm like, 'How do they know us?'

A Shafia family relative has told a Kingston, Ont., court that one of the family's daughters married simply to get revenge for cruelty suffered at the hands of her father. More...

Mrs. Smith has three daughters who are all getting married within the same month. She tells each one of her daughters to write back about their married life. To avoid possible embarrassment to their new husbands by openly discussing their love lives, the mother and daughters agree to using...

You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man." A lady inserted an ad in the...

Pick Up Truck Rodney Carrington im gettin married to my pickup truck it doesn't leave me when im down on my luck it doesn't shop at fancy stores or have a lawyer or want a divorce it doesn't care if I stay out late it doesn't bitch about the money i make we'll be together till the end it won't...

American singer Eddie Fisher died of complications from hip surgery at a hospital in Berkeley. He was 82. Eddie Fisher, whose huge fame as a pop singer was overshadowed by scandals ending his marriages to Debbie Reynolds and Elizabeth Taylor, has died. He was 82. His daughter, Tricia Leigh...

CW stars get married in Dallas DALLAS, (UPI) -- CW network stars Jenson Ackles and Danneel Harris have tied the knot in Dallas, a wedding guest revealed. Ackles, 32, who stars as a demon hunter in "Supernatural" and Harris, 31, best known as troublemaker Rachel on "One Tree Hill," walked...

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer...

Three Men Three men married wives from different countries. The first man married a woman from China. He told her that she was to do their dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away. The second...

Canadian Wives Three men married wives from different countries. The first man married a woman from China. He told her that she was to do their dishes and house cleaning.It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away. The...

Six stages of married life: 1: Tri-weekly 2: Try weekly 3: Try weakly 4. Try oysters 5: Try anything 6: Try to rememb

A man was invited for dinner at a friend's house. Every time the host needed something, he preceded his request to his wife by calling her "My Love", "Darling", "Sweetheart", etc., etc. His friend looked at him and said, "That's really nice after all of these years you've been married to keep...

Getting Married in Heaven -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple was involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process...

Marriage Names ? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho. If Ella Fitzgerald married...

Marriage Quotes By Men -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. Losing a wife can be hard. In my...

A golfer An 80-year old Irish man goes to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, 'How do you stay in such great physical condition?' I'm Irish and I am a golfer,' says the old guy,' and that's why I'm in such good shape.' I'm up well before...

An Interview With An Eighty-year-old Bride The local news station was interviewing an eighty-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time.. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at eighty, and then about her...

FREEHOLD, New Jersey (Reuters) – A New Jersey man who is divorcing his wife has accused rock star Bruce Springsteen of having an affair with her. Springsteen, who is married to singer Patti Scialfa, was accused by Arthur Kelly of Red Bank, New Jersey, of having an affair with his wife, Ann...