Beware Beware
PreferredByPete.com Enthusiast
Makes You Think
· Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
· Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are
early.
· Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end
and a fool at the other.
· Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals
are more popular than a five day test.
· Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.
· Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.
· Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
· Computer Engineer: One who gets paid for reading such mails......
· Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and
everybody disagrees later on.
· Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number
present.
· Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except that he got
caught.
· Dictionary: The only place where divorce comes before marriage.
· Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that
you actually look forward to the trip.
· Divorce: Future tense of marriage
· Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with
his bills.
· Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling
you have never felt before.
· Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
actually do.
· Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
· Father: A banker provided by nature.
· Father: An Automatic Teller Machine provided by nature.
· Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the
lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of
either".
· Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor
degree and woman gains her master.
· Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
· Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
life.
· Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally
falls into a river.
· Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in
midway "See I am not injured yet."
· Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
· Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken
of when dead.
· Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your
confidence after.
· Rumor: News that travels at the speed of sound.
· Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
· Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine power is defeated by
feminine power.
· Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
· Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
· Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are
early.
· Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end
and a fool at the other.
· Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals
are more popular than a five day test.
· Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.
· Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.
· Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
· Computer Engineer: One who gets paid for reading such mails......
· Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and
everybody disagrees later on.
· Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number
present.
· Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except that he got
caught.
· Dictionary: The only place where divorce comes before marriage.
· Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that
you actually look forward to the trip.
· Divorce: Future tense of marriage
· Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with
his bills.
· Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling
you have never felt before.
· Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
actually do.
· Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
· Father: A banker provided by nature.
· Father: An Automatic Teller Machine provided by nature.
· Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the
lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of
either".
· Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor
degree and woman gains her master.
· Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
· Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
life.
· Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally
falls into a river.
· Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in
midway "See I am not injured yet."
· Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
· Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken
of when dead.
· Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your
confidence after.
· Rumor: News that travels at the speed of sound.
· Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
· Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine power is defeated by
feminine power.
· Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.